HULINA.ORG/SONJA
March 31, 2006 :
I've gotta say I don't know what is up with me. I cried last night as I looked through some pictures from Vancouver and I was so happy about going there
that I couldn't help crying. Tonight a different story. I looked through pictures from last summer and I realized that after I came back, I haven't been
even nearly as happy as I was in France and as I was here a year or two ago. I don't know.. But it's true. This just doesn't feel like home. I mean,
I love the fact that I'm home now, but I wish home was elsewhere. A fresh start, you know? That's what I want. To love the place where I live.
As I went through the pictures, there were six songs playing on repeat: Blue Light by Bloc Party, Fix You by Coldplay, Pretty (Ugly Before) by Elliott Smith,
Twenty two fourteen by The Album Leaf, Wonderwall by Ryan Adams and finally Nothing Like You And I by The Perishers. I felt like adding some lyrics.
We spent some time
together walking
Spent some time just talking
about who we were
You held my hand so
very tightly
And told me what we
could be dreaming of
There’s nothing like you and I
We spent some time
together drinking
Spent some time just thinking
about days of joy
As our hearts started
beating faster
I recalled your laughter
from long ago
There’s nothing like you and I
We spent some time
together crying
Spent some time just trying
to let each other go
I held your hand so
very tightly
And told you what I would be
dreaming of
There’s nothing like you and I
So why do I even try?
There’s nothing like you and I
March 30, 2006 :
I'm going. I now have the tickets to Vancouver. Still no visa, but I figured the hell with the visa, it'll come.
And if not, I'll go anyway. Just have to come back a bit earlier. I'll just go. HAHA! June 8. That's like 10 weeks
from now. Shit!
I've been EXTREMELY lazy for the past days. Although, I've gone to the gym more than once, more than twice even! Yes! Three
times in three days! What is up with me? But I'm compensating, just had a load of ice cream. Mmmm!
It was really great staying at my parents' for a few days: went riding, watched some films, ate well, enjoyed our new
sauna... Lovely! And now I'm just waiting for Emilie to come and cheer me up a bit! Next week! Nice!
For once, I can be grateful for the Student Health Care Org. I'll get to see a physiotherapist for free. One hour of free
physiotherapy. I think that's neat.
March 23, 2006 :
Hello. As I should be writing yet another textual analysis, I decided to write here first. So first things first: I am happy.
I know! I'm surprised, too! I'm happy to be going home for a few days, to do nothing and to think about everything. To think about
my plans, as scary as it is. Still no visa, but I called to the organization through which I applied and they said there were
no problems with my application so I just need to wait a couple of days for the mail to reach me. So I guess, it's real. Canada.
I need to think about so many things. What to do with all my stuff, for starters. So if I have something that you'd be keen on "borrowing"
for half a year (like my collection of dictionaries or stuffed animals etc) then please tell me so I don't have to take everything to
my parents' place just to be dragged back here next winter. Then there is, of course, the question of what is mine, what is yours. I
really can't remember who owns which pot and knife and glass and so on.
It's all a bit terrifying. But I guess in a good way.
I've gotta go now, write that essay and then to a Historical and cultural readings discussion group (aka. not so much interesting).
March 13, 2006 :
Back home. Had the finest trip with Laura, 10 days of sore feet, 10 days in awe. 10 days in Manhattan.
10 lovely days, last two of which so nice and warm that it could have been confused as summer. Inara George, Rogue Wave and Nada Surf.
Improv Comedy Club, one of the great fun nights in my life. Nice new people from around the globe. An unexpected OC episode from the
future, even. A pile of new cd's and clothes. Loads of pics. One in a Spanish newspaper! Surprises, laughs, dollars spent. All good.
Today I've been lazying off. Tomorrow's anything but the same; school and work. The latter will be a little exciting, though, since
it's my first day in the new place. Same people, same burgers, new restaurant. I went by to say hi this morning and everyone was
being nice to me so I guess they're not mad about me first being on sick leave and then abroad.. I shouldn't worry so much.